what are you? To define is to limit

Reading 501 Great Writers: A Comprehensive Guide to the Giants of Literature. so many great writers. philosophers, artists, poets, novelists, politicians.

A few that caught my eye:

“pride, envy, avarice – these sparks have set on fire the hearts of al men” – Inferno, VI

Emerson in “Self-reliance” exhorts everyone to pay attention to their own “inner laws” ahead of societal expectation or religious beliefs. It is the individual, rather than the institution, which is truly sacred. “Whoso would be a man must be a nonconformist”

Memoriam A.H.H

I hold it true, whate'er befall; I feel it, when I sorrow most; 'Tis better to have loved and los Than never to have loved at all.

Hiroshige prints and drawings by Prestel

• Ochanomizu
• Kanaya– the distant bank of Oi river
• The small port and the inlet in Awa province
• Rough sea at the whirlpools at Awa
• The Sea at Satta in Suruga Province
• A Sudden Shower over Ohashi and Atake
• Fireworks over Ryogoku Bridge
• Evening view of Saruwaka street
• The Timber-yard at Fukagawa
• The Drum Bridge and Yuhi hill at Megueo

The Cost of Living by Deborah Levy

we either die of the past or we become an artist.

Ideas come to us as the successors to griefs, and griefs, at the moment when they change into ideas, lose some part of their power to injure the heart; the transformation itself, even, for an instant, releases suddenly a little joy. – Proust, Du côté de chez Swann

writing was one of the few activities in which I could handle the anxiety of uncertainty, of not knowing what was going to happen next

good things that happened today

• read Art of Doing Science and Engineering
• chats with friends
• protein shakes that tastes good
• the sun and the weather
• the walkable city
• the bus drivers
• sfpl, north beach branch
• got to study and make my cheat sheet
• read about famous writer's + looked at some Hiroshige art
• printed my cheat sheet for free
• saw a cute children's playground
• saw more flowers by the street
• saw a lot of italian restaurants with people enjoying their time chatting
• visited Cloud-Hidden Plants, there's so many fancy schmancy plant things
• visited city lights again, discovered a few interesting books
• walked all the way home from the library
• i live in chinatown and I see chinese people everywhere and tourists from all over the world
• i have a rooftop in my apartment that I can go to clear my head
• I can use prayer as a form of catharsis

not so great things

• anxious about the people at the library, some of them are sketchy, not feeling safe, worried someone will steal my things
• feeling out-of-place and alone
• losing sense of direction and meaning
• missing a problem or idea to obsess about
• feeling like I'm not working on anything important or useful
• financial anxiety, tuition and braces cost upcoming
• feeling guilty of not making it on my own
• lacked in-person social interactions
• not feeling secure about myself
• feeling nostalgic and longing and yearning
• seeing this program as a "I have to" instead of a "I get to"
• not feeling understood by people around me, haven't found people that get me, that I click with instantly, still going through the initial phase of friendships with everyone, i guess this takes time
• feeling bloated