Stop comparing yourself to others

April 24, 2023


Don't Compare Your Insides to Others' Outsides

I used to compare my academic achievements with others a lot. Growing up in Malaysia and in an Asian household, you're pretty much expected to do good in school. I was also religious about ping pong, and devoted a big chunk of my primary and high school life to playing. I always had a friend who was better than me, and compared myself to him a lot.

Once I got out of high school and entered college, grades still mattered to me, but I was comparing myself with others on social qualities, i.e. how they dressed, how charismatic they were, and how many friends they had. I grew up wired to be quiet, and I sometimes wish being social and charismatic could just be a flip of a switch. I do believe once you do it more, it can become a switch, but right now I'm still at the point where forcing myself to socialize is taxing.

Now, when I'm about to graduate, my focus and value system shifted more towards career and startups. I see 16 year olds on Twitter selling their startups and high school students getting internships at startups and I get incredibly envious, but moments later I get this intense drive and motivation.

A common advice is to stop comparing yourself to others, especially someone you only see on the surface and to only compare yourself to the you from yesterday.

But I think you can extract some value by comparing yourself with others.

It can give you the necessary drive and fuel your motivation in times when you feel like you're in a rut.

It makes me go "That could be me!" and it makes be believe I can go bigger, do better. I might fail, but at least I'm taking risks.