i woke up just less than 3 hours after i closed my eyes and entered dream state, filled with sharp and concentrated pain around my right pelvic joint. my knee and toe were slightly numb, and i couldn't move my leg. i was worried i lost my leg. i couldn't fall asleep with that fear, i had a few calls with T, she helped calm my mind. i was able to focus on something else. i remember feeling my right thigh burning constantly, naturally i went to get an ice pack, and it soothed it for teh time being.

i could barely walk when i managed to get out of bed, i was basically limping. i felt like i was cursed again. i felt angry and helpless.

after breakfast and a nap on the table, i tried napping but the pain got worse, and i eventually caved. W took me on an uber to the chinese hospital, it's rather fitting since i am chinese. interestingly, this is also the hospital where bruce lee was born, 84 years ago.

only the ER is open today, first guy i see inside is a homeless man sitting on one of the chairs. there's an unpleasant smell. after registration, and some slight fears about my insurance not being applicable, i wore the hospital wristbands, probably my 3rd one this year. and my 5th hospital visit.

after waiting a while, i got called into the ER room. i had to take off my pants. i was a little embarrassed. i also wore their gown. after answering some basic questions that the nurse shot at me, the american doctor came and doing some quick checks. after a few different leg exercises and pain checks, he concluded that it was just a pelvic ligament stretch. i felt relieved, but it did not feel like i was completely off the hook.

i ate 7.5 mg meloxicam and 2 pills of 20mg omeprazole to protect my stomach before i was allowed to go home. the wait at the pharmacy was the longest, i happened to find out later that the medicine would've cost >100 dollars, but i ended up only paying $11. wild.

i had salmon and kimchi, my usual meal lately, and my stomach hurt the rest of the night. something about that painkiller caused my heartburn and pain to return and haunt me again. i felt worried about how in order to be free of pain, i had to sacrifice my stomach. it got better towards bedtime.

it reminded me of how much i take daily activities for granted. that health is not guaranteed, and basic tasks like wearing socks and pants, can be difficult, or impossible, and i'm blessed in many ways, more than i know.